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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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But back to the job. Ion finally shows up, like, an hour late. He’s all flustered, saying he got caught up in some “important business.” Yeah, right. I’m thinking, “Dude, your ‘business’ better be worth my time.” We get to work, and I’m trying to keep my cool. But then, the equipment? It’s all messed up. Like, how do you mess up radio gear? I’m losing it.

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